Dorothy: [00:00:00] For Wayne and Ivanna Sallee, it all began with Wayne’s emergency eye surgery, but it was quickly followed by Ivanna’s shocking breast cancer diagnosis at age 33. Wayne and Ivanna are here to talk about their experience and how they had to make certain changes in their life to be sure that Ivanna made it through. Their support of each other, the way that they handled this diagnosis, and the way that they want to help others is truly remarkable.
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Let’s Talk About Your Breast, a different kind of podcast presented to you by The Rose, Breast Center of Excellence and a Texas treasure. You’re going to hear frank [00:01:00] discussions about tough topics, and you’re going to learn why knowing about your breast could save your life.
So Wayne and Ivanna, thank you so much for being with us today. This is such a treat. It’s a pleasure to have you both here, and I know we’re going to be talking about your breast cancer experience, but I’m kind of curious, how did you two even get together? I mean, Ukraine, the U. S., or were you here then?
Ivanna: So I guess I’ll start. I went to a university in Ukraine, and my university had a program so the students could come to the United States every summer for a work and travel program. So I would come work here during the summer. And then we had a couple of weeks before and after to travel, explore the United States. And after I graduated college, I decided to stay here from all of the places.
I chose Galveston, of course, wonderful place to be. And probably a year later, I decided to go with my [00:02:00] friends to celebrate birthday party at, uh, at the bar in Webster. Uh, so it was January 13th, we went to the Sherlock’s, unfortunately this place is no longer there, and this wonderful guy was working there that night.
Dorothy: Oh, you were working there?
Wayne: I was, so I did a bit of, uh, tending bar, you know, I was going through grad school. And, um, we still argue about which date it was, but I guess for conversation’s sake we’ll settle on the 13th.
Dorothy: Why is that an argument?
Wayne: Because I, I, I—
Dorothy: He likes to prove his point, and I know my dates right.
Wayne: She’s clearly right. I do recall that it was specifically a Sunday though, because, uh, I typically do not work on Sundays and I was asked to come in to support the, the bar. So I went in and, uh, somewhere about 7:30/8:00 o’clock, you know, this group comes in and what I recognized was what happened to be the most beautiful woman I’d ever seen.
And I remember my, um, my, [00:03:00] one of my security, my door guys comes up and he’s like, Oh, you know, this, this girl that’s in this group, she’s gorgeous. And was hap, happened to be talking about her friend. And I told him, well, clearly you’re blind, bud, because that girl is beautiful. And obviously he was talking about Ivanna.
So, uh, throughout the night as, uh, as things progressed, she’d come up and, you know, was serving her. And, and I got the courage to, to ask her, Hey, can I buy you a drink? Which, uh, all night, I believe, she was drinking just well Vodka and Red Bulls. And, and she’s like, of course, you know, you can buy me a drink. Well, what can I get you? She’s like, I’ll take a, a Top Shelf Grey Goose Double and Red Bull. So now I went from Well to Super Premium. And somewhere between making that drink, she had called over her other friends. And so now I had four or five other girls that I had to talk to buy drinks for her. So it was, uh, it was a classic, uh, [00:04:00] shell game, but, uh, but that’s, that’s how we first met. And then, um, you know, after that, you know, it was definitely, uh, was pursuing her, uh, you know, doing everything I can to, uh, win her affection, if you will, even learning, uh, Ukrainian.
Ivanna: He did. He did.
Dorothy: Oh, did he really?
Ivanna: Yes. So, uh, on a second date he showed up, uh, knowing all of the alphabet and he could pronounce my last name correctly.
Dorothy: And tell us that last name.
Ivanna: Yakuch.
Dorothy: Ooh, . Yeah. Uh, ooh. Uh, that would be a—
Ivanna: if he could spell it, he could say it. Uh.
Dorothy: And were you impressed?
Ivanna: I was, I was really impressed because nobody else from American people could ever pronounce any of the Ukrainian words correctly.
Dorothy: Ah.
Wayne: And it just so happens that every letter in the Cyrillic alphabet was in her last name, so that’s how I learned it.
Dorothy: That’s good.
Wayne: So, and then, you know, as things of course progressed, um, I guess we can kind of speed up to one of our first dates, [00:05:00] where, uh, she had gone out of town and, um, she was kind enough to come back and, uh, she had purchased a really nice bottle of red for a dinner that I was, I was going to host to cook for her.
And at the time, I only had, uh, you know, the red Solo cups. It didn’t even have glassware. And so she comes over with this 100 plus bottle of red wine. And, um, she notices this crock pot that I’ve mysteriously, you know, got on the counter. Again, not much furniture in this apartment. And, uh, she’s like, well, this is great. You’re cooking jambalaya for me. We’re, we’re the bowls for the dishes. I’m sure she’s, you know, looking at the sink like, oh, no, no, don’t worry about that. See, I, I cooked it at my mother’s house, put in a crock pot and transport it over. I wanted to keep it warm.
Ivanna: It was a red flag. I was like, all right, well, whatever you want to say.
Wayne: So, so she tries my Jambalaya, and she’s like, this is the best dish I’ve ever had. Well, that’s because I’m an exceptional cook.
Ivanna: Yeah, and then like years go by, I’m asking him, where [00:06:00] did you find this recipe to cook jambalaya in a crockpot? He’s like, I just Googled the first things that popped out. That’s what I used. So over the years, like I tried like four or five different recipes, how to cook jambalaya in a crockpot, and they’re just not good. You cannot cook jambalaya in a crockpot.
Dorothy: Yeah. So there was a sacred ingredient or a way of cooking this?
Wayne: So probably after, long after our first child, uh, we went and had a date night at uh, BJ’s Brewery. And uh, she’s thumbing through the um, you know, the, the, the menu. And she’s like, oh, you know, this jambalaya looks fantastic. At this point, I’m sweating. Cause my secret’s about to be out of the bag.
Dorothy: Oh my gosh!
Wayne: And so she, uh, she orders. And it comes in and, and you know, I mean, the, as soon as she has that first bite, you know, first thing I’m asking is, what do you think of the jambalaya? It can’t be as good as mine, right? It’s good, but no, I mean, I, I still, it’s still not as good as yours. You see, I, I’m clearly the world’s best chef, making the [00:07:00] world’s best jambalaya.
Ivanna: So he took it to go and just put it in a crock pot in his apartment.
Wayne: Yeah.
Dorothy: Oh my gosh. The lengths you went through to get her attention.
Wayne: Absolutely. It must’ve worked because here we are today.
Dorothy: How long did you date?
Wayne: Oh goodness. We dated for, uh, you know, over a year and, uh, she was, she was one of the, so I’m a little bit older than Ivanna. And, uh, you know, I had my fair share of, uh, you know, just one or two girlfriends and, uh, realized—
Dorothy: Not sure we’re going to go there.
Wayne: And realized that, um, you know, this, this person, was for me, how special she truly was. I’d always actually personally had kind of an affinity to women from, you know, that, that region, Ukraine, Russian for, for me personally, my observation was I always thought that they were beautiful and it just, uh, just happenstance worked out. And, um, you know, as they say, the rest has been magical.
Ivanna: He was, he was bartending, so he was [00:08:00] making really good cocktails and he was making me those cocktails all the way through until we got married.
Wayne: Clearly I kept my life tour.
Dorothy: He had his own way of getting you, right? Yes. Yes. So you both come from a very, um, a different kind of background and I’m not talking about, you know, where you lived or anything like that, but you were, you were in finance and your education was all along that line.
Ivanna: Yes.
Dorothy: And you’re Engineering?
Wayne: Correct.
Dorothy: Okay, so both very logical type people or not?
Ivanna: I would say so.
Dorothy: Yeah.
Wayne: She’s always right.
Dorothy: Oh, she’s always right. Well, that’s good. I’m glad you learned that early. Probably, yeah.
Ivanna: A couple years.
Dorothy: So, Ivanna, you have had a breast cancer diagnosis.
Ivanna: Yes.
Dorothy: Tell us about that.
Ivanna: It was probably longer than most people’s stories. So people usually like, it happens later in life, so they already had a [00:09:00] mammogram and like it happens like in that year. For me, uh, I was diagnosed this year in March, so 2024. But I remember first time I complained to my OBGYN doctors that like I have a lump that hurts my breast in 2018 at least.
And in 2018 I was pregnant, just had a kid. She’s like, well, maybe it’s related to the pregnancy and nursing, other things. And then every year I would go and complain about the same thing, same site, same place. And it would begin like, she would ask like, do you have a history of breast cancer in the family?
No, I don’t. There is nothing to worry about. It’s something related to breastfeeding or pregnancy or other things. And I remember even when I would go to my physician and they would be like, do you have any new complaints? I was like, besides the lump in my breast, did I complain to my OBGYN already? And she said, it’s fine. I don’t have anything else to complain about.
So, the years went by, um, and, um, this year, like, I had the kid in 2021 as well, so I was pregnant, breastfeeding again, they, [00:10:00] they did not look at any symptoms again, and, um, I guess in January, we were planning for another pregnancy, so I went to see my OBGYN again, I was like, well, I’m not pregnant, I’m not nursing for a year now, like, and that lump is still there, like, and I think it’s growing.
So it was the first year when she looked at that, and she was like, did you lose any weight? Maybe just showing up more. I was like, no, like, if anything, I gained a couple pounds. So she referred me for a mammogram, and because I have a dense breast, things like that tend to hide more what I discovered. And, um, during the mammogram process, they looked at me and said, most likely everything’s fine. There was some calcifications and the lymph node, one of the lymph nodes was inflammated. So they’re like, well, just to be sure we can get the biopsy done, but most likely everything’s fine. And luckily I do have insurance, but the deductible on insurance is still high. So they’re saying probably everything’s fine.
I’m getting the estimate for my biopsy and said probably I don’t need this. What I’m thinking like [00:11:00] $3,200. I was like, do I really want to pay $3,200 for them to tell me that I’m fine? But I like, I decided to do it. I was like, if my car would need a part or something else for $3,200, I would do it without even thinking about it.
So, I need to think about, about my health same way. So, I went for the biopsy, um, and even during that time, the physician was saying like, I don’t see anything wrong. You just have dense breasts. Everything should be fine. And they told me, um, we, we gonna call you into the doctor’s office when we have results. Probably it’s gonna be in about a week or two. Like, it might take a little bit longer for the results to arrive. And, um, two days later, I’m getting a phone call, March 7th, I was in the office and they’re saying like, we have your results from the biopsy. And I’m thinking to myself, it’s a little too early. I’m like, they said it’s going to take about two weeks for the results to arrive. Um, and I’m in my head. I’m like, well, if they’re not calling me into the doctor’s office, probably everything’s fine. So I’m listening, not [00:12:00] expecting the results, of course, and they’re like telling me the results are positive.
And like. I just cannot hear anything. I have this ringing in my ears. Like I cannot hear the word what they’re saying at this point. All I remember is that it’s positive. They’re saying something about level three. So grade three. That’s not stage three, but I’m thinking in my head, it’s stage three. It’s bad. I’m dying. So I finished the conversations. They’re like, well, write it down, the phone number. So you need to call a doctor for the, for the referral breast surgeon. I’m writing the number down and I’m asking, um, how soon do I need to call? And they tell me the sooner the better, while you still have options.
Dorothy: Oh my gosh.
Ivanna: And I just lost it.
Dorothy: Oh, of course. Of course. How old were you then?
Ivanna: 33. So at that point, like, I don’t know what to do. I just closed my computer. Well, canceled my meetings first [00:13:00] for the rest of the day. Closed my computer and went home. Called this guy on the way. That’s how we find out.
Dorothy: What did you think when she called you?
Wayne: So, you know, uh.
Dorothy: You knew what she was doing?
Wayne: Yeah, you know, we, we knew kind of where we’re at. I think you got to step back a couple of things, at least from my perspective. Um, don’t necessarily know if, you know, the, the physician, I don’t want to say the physician was ever dismissive, right? I think the physician, uh, and her doctor has you know, kind of delivered all of our children and it’s been a wonderful doctor practitioner. Uh, I think it was just one of those things. She was younger and probably just didn’t correlate the two together. Uh, but you know, kudos to Ivanna for fighting her body, knowing her body and, and, and keeping pushing and pushing.
One of the, [00:14:00] the, the things that, uh, and, and she’s a above everything that she’s phenomenal. At, or does, she’s an exceptional mother. And, you know, we got three young boys and, and we were actually, um, we had been diagnosed, uh, with a miscarriage in October. And, uh, you know, that was really hard because, you know, we were, we were very excited about bringing our fourth in.
And you were, as you were going through all that, you were trying to get some of your hormone levels back to the level. And so in that process, you know, she was going back and seeing her, her care physician and, uh, was, was bringing that up. And it mentioned, Hey, you know, everything I told you previously, it’s, uh, it’s kind of, I feel like it’s metastasized or gotten, gotten bigger.
Um, you know, again, fighting for, you know, pushing for a biopsy. And so, you know, interestingly enough, you know, it’s funny how things mysteriously work, [00:15:00] right? I mean, not that there’s any silver lining to losing a child or, you know, having a bad pregnancy. But, um, you know, because of that, in a lot of ways, she was, she was able to get in front of her practitioner sooner and and kind of push and get diagnosed, right?
This is a woman that I recall we were, you know, a few years back, she had taken the boys to do something and she had smashed her finger In the car door, yeah, that, that hurts enough as is, but then she calls me and she’s like, Hey, I’m coming home. I have my finger wrapped. Uh, I just smashed in the car door.
I’m like, well, you’re pretty calm for that. And she comes home and sure enough, it’s wrapped in a bloody towel. We have to go to, um, you know, an urgent care. She’s, you know, got to get sutures and all sorts of stuff. So she is a tough cookie. [00:16:00] And, and when she, when she called me, um, you know, ultimately, you know, she, she, she broke down, but at first, I mean, she was just I mean, just a testament to what type of person she is, analytically processing everything. And I could see that, right. And I think that was tough because I know my wife, I, you know, I know her as a mother, as a best friend, um, you know, as my best friend. And, uh, you know, for her to analytically be processing that, you know, I, you know, also being left brain, I could kind of go through that with her and I knew it was painful, but she was just putting on this strong front. And, um, It was, uh, it was not what we anticipated to hear. Let’s put it that way.
Ivanna: And of course, statistically speaking, like been diagnosed with breast cancer at the age of 33, like the chances are so small.
Dorothy: I cannot even count the number of women who have sat in that chair and told us the same story. So it is so important that you are sharing [00:17:00] this. Young women don’t think they can get breast cancer. Their doctors don’t think they can get breast cancer. I, I’ve had so many women tell me, My doctor said I was too young for a mammogram, but I wasn’t too young for breast cancer. So, that’s a very big message and one that we cannot share enough. The other common denominator is having a child.
And this would not be something your doctor would be really aware of right now. Uh, because it’s just starting to, you know how things have to build and you have to have trends and you have to, and in medicine everything is seven to ten years. But we are starting to see a number of breast cancers diagnosed in that first year after pregnancy and it’s becoming a real, um, I don’t want to call it a risk factor yet, [00:18:00] but it’s a caution to all physicians that it needs to be considered whenever there’s a change in the breast.
And yes, there’s a lot of changes when you’re pregnant, but that’s why your story is so important. It’s, it’s being that advocate for yourself. I mean that had to take a lot of guts to keep saying this is change. This has changed. Yeah. Did your and your doctor ultimately listened?
Ivanna: Yes. Yes. Yes, but I remember like since 2018 and our doctor was saying like maybe at age of 30, we can schedule you for mammogram and then I waited two more years at the age of 30. She’s like well, it starts at 40. So there’s no history of breast cancer like in the dense breast, of course, like she probably did not have a reason, but like, if you listen to your body, you know that something’s wrong.
Dorothy: Boy, that is another huge message, you know, because you know, your body, nobody knows your body like yourself. I mean, it’s just, [00:19:00] that’s just the way it is. And too often we think, well, they’re the experts. So they’ve got to know. No, I don’t. Not always. So what did you first feel when you were able to process. How did, where was your mind going then once you processed it?
Ivanna: Scared. Well, I guess at that point I just had to listen to the doctors and tell me and do what they tell me because there was no other options.
Dorothy: No. Yeah.
Ivanna: And at that point, um, well, when I came home, talked to my husband, uh, the nurse navigator called us back. And at that point, I could process the information a little bit better. So she explained everything, what the biopsy came back with, that it was a ductal carcinoma in situ. It was not a stage three. It’s a grade three. It’s a different things. So I guess the more information I got, the easier it was for me to process. [00:20:00]
Dorothy: And what was your treatment?
Ivanna: Uh, well, at first when I went to see my doctor, she recommended basically a lumpectomy, just on the impacted side, but we had to get an MRI done first and a genetic test. The genetic test came back negative. So she said, I don’t need to have double mastectomy, but if it’s lumpectomy or mastectomy on my left side, we’re still gonna have to see an MRI. So MRI came back showing that there is cancer cells in the 70 percent of my breast. So lumpectomy wasn’t an option.
Dorothy: Mm hmm.
Ivanna: And, um, we did go with double mastectomy and I couldn’t decide till the, probably, a day before the surgery.
Dorothy: Ah. That’s a tough decision.
Ivanna: It is.
Wayne: You know, but I mean, it’s clearly you know, to give her recognition, I mean, it’s, you know, [00:21:00] I consider us both practical and pragmatic people and that’s what we were looking at. We were looking at all the statistical probability on pursuing one thing as opposed to the other. And and I feel that the Physician support we got, all the different doctors, whether it’s the oncologist, the radiation specialist, the breast tissue doctors, you know, and, and even the, um, the plastic surgeons that we, we’ve dealt with were, were all exceptional.
Yes. And they were, did you, did you have something, you know, I was just going to say they were all forthcoming and transparent. We asked them, Hey, what, you know, what are the odds? You know, what are the statistics? What are the facts? And I felt like every one of them were honestly, transparent and said, this is what you have. These are your options. And I think that allowed us to kind of suspend all the emotion, put that to the side and make the best statistical decision for Ivanna possible.
Dorothy: But still, [00:22:00] I mean, I think my personal opinion, that’s a really tough decision to have this option or this option.
Ivanna: So yes, making those choices was difficult, especially at first when we walked in, so like, well, it’s up to you. We can do double mastectomy, single mastectomy. We can do lumpectomy. It’s for you to decide. So if you do lumpectomy, you need radiation. If you do the mastectomy, like you don’t need radiation. So I went in with a double mastectomy to reduce my chance of recurrence because of my age. And, um, I was hoping I don’t need anything else.
But the margins, because it was so big, came back at one millimeter. And they said like, because of the margins, like, we would recommend radiation at this point. And that’s not something I was walking in into, so I was like a little bit concerned and they, and once again, they didn’t say like, you absolutely have to have it. They said it’s up to you. If you want to have it, we can, we can, we can. Do the course of radiation for you. [00:23:00] So at that point I wanted to get a second opinion in MD Anderson and I was hoping, I just wanted somebody to tell me, do I need it or I don’t need it. I didn’t want to make the decision myself. It’s like, if they tell me I have to have it, I’ll do it. If they tell me I don’t have to have it, I don’t want to have it. Like you don’t want to put anything else in your body if you don’t need it, if it’s not going to help you. So when we went to MD Anderson, I was thinking they’re going to tell me we have seen the worst cases and like, you’re good. There’s nothing else you need.
But they told me like we would recommend either radiation or incision to make sure we can get a better margin. So we went, like, I chose the option of the second surgery, of course, because it seems a little bit less time consuming. It’s a one day surgery, and then the recovery time. So that’s what happened in August, end of August. And the margins, um, came back good. There is no more cancer cells. And I was really happy for someone to tell me that I don’t need radiation at that point.
Dorothy: Right, right. I, [00:24:00] I think that’s so reasonable. Sometimes I, I wonder, and I understand all the reasons I’ve been doing this a long, long time, but I still think when it, when you have someone sitting in front of you and they’re saying, well, it’s your option. You know, that is tough. You did the all the right things and you have, you had to come to that decision. Absolutely. Absolutely. Yeah.
Ivanna: If I would decide not to do radiation and don’t get the second opinion, if something would happen like years from now, I would regret it.
Dorothy: Oh yes, yes. And that, again, another big message for our listeners, don’t be afraid to go get it, don’t be afraid you’re going to insult your doctor or anything like that because, that’s right, it’s your body, nobody else is going to stand up and say take me when it’s time, no, it’s your body. So how do you two talk about this now, I mean you’re just so fresh, [00:25:00] freshly in it, out of it, are you feeling like it’s done?
Ivanna: Well, this guy basically told me the same thing, like, it’s your body, you make a decision. So he, he supported me in everything that I decided, but I don’t think he gave much of his feedback, what he thinks is the right thing for me to do. And it helps.
Wayne: Yeah. I mean, that’s always kind of in my place in this, I mean, is support, you know, what she needs to do to make herself feel whole and healthy. Right? And so if I can provide any type of guidance, support, wisdom, to the best of my knowledge, then I’m there to support my wife and my best friend. But at the end of the day, your point, it’s her decision.
Dorothy: Right.
Wayne: And so, I mean, I think they, they tell you that you’re, you’re never really out of it. So I can’t answer and say that we feel like, you know, we’re, we’re past it, but [00:26:00] you know, everything is moving fast. It’s new. I think we’re blessed to have, you know, being in the epicenter of, you know, medical care and getting the best doctors and physicians and moving quickly. I think we’re, you know, we’re, we’re comfortable with that, but you know, to be determined.
Dorothy: Who do you think worried more about the other one? Did you worried about him just as much as you worried about yourself?
Ivanna: Absolutely.
Dorothy: Absolutely. And you knew that?
Wayne: Oh, she’s well, outside of her yelling at me and cranium words, every now and then, you know, or, or tell, telling me all the bad things, you know, that I’m, I’m not doing, no. She has never given me any doubt to not believe that she’s, you know, thinking about me or concerned or worried about me. And, and clearly for both of us worried about our children. We feel that, you know, these days, you know, I mean, it’s, children just seem to grow up so fast, right? I mean, they’re, they’re just so plugged into so many different things [00:27:00] and, you know, not to sound biased or boastful, you know, having, you know, three little boys that, uh, you know, are wonderful, but you know, we have some really smart cookies as my wife would say, and sometimes we just want them to, not be immersed in everything, to not be knowledgeable of everything, and kind of sheltering, protecting them. I think it was tough.
Dorothy: But they know.
Wayne: I think our, um, I think our oldest knows.
Ivanna: Yeah, we did not sit down to talk to them about cancer and all of this. We just told them that I’m gonna have a surgery, and I’ll be fine better, but they’re gonna have to help me, like I cannot carry them anymore, and other things like that. So even now they’re still asking, are you better?
Dorothy: And that’s okay. Yeah, that’s okay. You know, at some point when they realize, they’ll look back and think, oh, yeah, that’s what mom was going through.
Wayne: Absolutely. You got the, the little ones wanting mommy to pick them up.
Dorothy: Oh yeah.
Wayne: She’s unfortunately not able to.
Dorothy: So Wayne.
Wayne: Yes ma’am. [00:28:00]
Dorothy: You couldn’t fix this. Did you ever feel frustrated because you couldn’t fix it?
Wayne: All the time. All the time. Um, because, I mean, that’s what I do, you know, in my industry, right? I’m fixing, providing solutions to problems. Uh, maybe not as much these days in the sense of kind of more of a managerial leadership, but, but I’m fixing different problems, you know?
So, there’s an inadequacy, if you will, of wanting to just, you know, for lack of a better term, visually scoop your wife in your arms and tell her, it’s going to be okay. We’re going to get through this tomorrow. It’s going to be resolved. But you don’t know.
Dorothy: But you did tell her that.
Wayne: I did tell her that.
Dorothy: Of course.
Wayne: I did tell her that.
Dorothy: Well, you have to. Yeah. Yeah. That is, that is what I hear from spouses so often. You know, I couldn’t fix it and I was frustrated.
Wayne: Sure. Well, and then she had to do, [00:29:00] she physically had to do the same for me. I mean.
Ivanna: Oh yes, that was a funny story. So my treatment was, my surgery was on April 22nd and I was thinking like, as soon as I can, like we want to go on vacation. So, uh, as soon as the school was over, even like two days before, like I remember May 25th, I was like, the Friday we were supposed to back our stuff and go on the road trip to Zion, Yellowstone in Colorado. Everybody were so excited about it. And this guy May 21st going for, um, eye checkup because he had some floaters and things like that. So he’s calling me from the, uh, from the doctor’s office that he has to have emergency surgery on his eye. He had detached retina.
Dorothy: Oh my gosh.
Ivanna: Yes. So my surgery was April 22nd and his was May 22nd, so exactly a month later. So, May 21st, we’re sitting in the doctor’s office, uh, and they’re explaining how the surgery will go. So, he’s gonna have this bubble of gas in his [00:30:00] eye, and he needs to lay down face down, cannot fly, cannot go to the high elevation, no mountains for us. And he needs to basically be laying down face down like this, uh, 20 hours a day. Like he can just get up and go use a restroom like for like two weeks and then he cannot fly or do anything like that for until like, until August.
So the summer plans are canceled. And I’m sitting there like a month after the surgery. And my doctor tells me that I need to sleep on a bed elevated. Like with my upper back up and he needs to sleep face down. Like he cannot pick it up anything heavy. I cannot pick it up anything heavy. I was like, we are a wonderful couple.
Dorothy: Oh my gosh.
Wayne: Yeah. Oh, I had, I had gone into the weekend, um, and lost and recognized that 5 percent of my field of vision, you know, I’d started developing a blind spot. Between Friday and Monday, I’d gone from 5 percent to 70 percent of my field of vision.
Dorothy: Oh, how scary.
Wayne: And so anyway, yeah, I [00:31:00] went in, saw a retinal specialist and within, you know, a minute less, they’re like, yeah, your retina’s detaching. You have to go get emergency surgery. And I said, well, timeout. I’m, I’m here for steroid drops and eye drops. That’s all I’m here for. I’m not here for surgery. So, uh, it was quick and fast, but she was definitely in my corner, you know, let, you know, basically a month after her stuff.
Dorothy: But how do you stay on your face 20 hours a day. I mean, how did you do that?
Ivanna: There’s these pillows on Amazon, like kind of like with the hole or basically, if you imagine the massage table, that’s only one way, like you can comfortably do it. Even like sitting at the table, like you would put this pillow down on the table and just lay down like this.
Wayne: Burned through a lot of audio books, I’ll tell you that much. I bet you did. So I got a lot of jokes, you know, how, how are the optics of things? Do you see yourself getting better? You know, got a lot of those. Yeah. So we are a perfect couple in that regard.
Ivanna: Yes.
Dorothy: Well, it sounds like you [00:32:00] both had quite a, quite a journey. And I know that you are on your way back to full, mending, full recovery. Of course, you’re going to stay vigilant.
Ivanna: Absolutely.
Dorothy: Absolutely. So, what would you tell a young woman who finds something in her breast?
Ivanna: Well, definitely advocate for your health. Get a mammogram. If you, if a doctor doesn’t refer you to get a mammogram, um, get a second opinion.
Definitely. And one of the things that I learned through this process, I did not realize that I was never tested for the vitamin D and vitamin D levels are so important. And it was low for me, I assume my whole life, because that’s how I was feeling. And by taking supplements and doing the right things, like just take care of your body, all of the tests.
Stay active, eat healthy, and we went through all of this stuff, reading about breast cancer, because it wasn’t hormonal for me, it was environmental. [00:33:00] About the cookware, the plastic ware, and all of those things that you, that’s better not to use it in your everyday life. The other ends, um, and you can go on and on and on, just make the healthy choices in your life.
Dorothy: And what do you have for a husband who’s having to walk through this with their wife?
Wayne: Listen, I, I, I second what she’s saying. I mean, we’ve completely changed our lifestyle. We’ve, you know, no paraben deodorants. And I mean, we’re not using any nonstick cookware, everything’s stainless. So, you know, for, for any dad chefs out there, you’re going to have to learn to recook on a stainless steel cookware. Cause that’s different.
Dorothy: Oh, I bet he has. Yes. Yes.
Wayne: So, but yeah, I think you, you adjust, you adapt. And I think the biggest thing of course, is being supportive of your wife, your children, if you have any, you know, the family in general, because it’s, um, you know, it is something you’re going through together as a team, but you, you [00:34:00] always got to be that foundation of the bedrock.
Ivanna: And support from the family and friends and people around you. It’s amazing. And not only for me, like for the significant other, like for my husband, the support he needs just as much.
Dorothy: Oh, such good advice. Yes. We forget no matter how strong and stoic they can be.
Ivanna: Absolutely.
Dorothy: They, they get scared too.
Wayne: We’ve realized through all this that mental and emotional health is just as important as physical health.
Dorothy: Yes. Yes. Oh my gosh, you have given our listeners so many good tips and thank you so much for sharing your story and being so open. It’s not easy, not easy to talk about some of these things. I
Ivanna: feel like it’s getting easier over the time.
Dorothy: Good.
Ivanna: Still, I’m still new to this and I was thinking like, I’m going to go to the breast cancer survivor group. We’re going to talk about it. [00:35:00] And I realized I’m not ready for this yet. Like at work, we had a work event and there were so many people with the cancer and like everybody’s emotions just impact you as well. And I was like one on one, it was very helpful to talk with the people like about their stuff, what they went through, my stuff, what, what I went through, but in a bigger groups, it’s, um, I’m still getting very emotional.
Dorothy: Right. And, and that’s. That’s okay. See, you, you are really in tune with yourself and your body and know when that boundary needs to be put up and that’s a lesson all of us could learn because you can get toxic people or you can get that time when you just feel like it’s too much.
Wayne: And, and I would, I’d like to say on just on behalf of my wife and I, thank you for having us as guests and allowing us to both share our story. I would say the, you know, one of the biggest motivators for all this was to your point is, is people want to hear different experiences. [00:36:00] And I’ve just been so fascinated by how embracive the community, friends, um, have been through all this. Someone either is directly influenced, indirectly influenced, or just empathetically want to help. And that’s what we want to do. We want to give back and help.
Dorothy: Oh, that’s so, so special and so important. And, and such a big part of living these days. We need each other.
Wayne: Absolutely.
Dorothy: Yeah. Well, thank you again. And I’m sure we’re going to have you back because I know you’re going to learn more in these next few months and have more to share. Thank you.
Wayne: You’re very welcome.
Ivanna: Thank you.
Post-Credits: Thank you for joining us today on Let’s Talk About Your Breasts. This podcast is produced by Speke Podcasting and brought to you by The Rose. Visit therose.org to learn more about our organization. Subscribe to our podcast. Share episodes with friends and join the conversation on social media using #LetsTalkAboutYourBreasts. We welcome your feedback and [00:37:00] suggestions. Consider supporting The Rose. Your gift can make the difference to a person in need. And remember, self care is not selfish, it’s essential.
