Dorothy: [00:00:00] Hi, I’m Dorothy Gibbons, CEO and co founder of The Rose. Today, it is my privilege to introduce you to a remarkable individual whose passion and dedication has brought light to the lives of so many women in need. Star Hand is a fundraiser extraordinaire. She’s raised hundreds of thousands of dollars for The Rose and her commitment to our mission is a testament to the power of community.
She loves to throw a good party. And she’s the one who knows how to do it.
Let’s Talk About Your Breast. A different kind of podcast presented to you by The Rose. The Breast Center of Excellence and a Texas treasure. You’re going to hear frank discussions about tough topics. And you’re going to learn why knowing about your breast could save your life. Join us as we hear another story and we answer those tough questions that you may have.[00:01:00]
So, of all the people I’ve ever met, Star, you simply do not seem like a serious fundraiser. I mean, you are a party organizer extraordinaire. You are, uh, someone that goes all over the world and, and every time I see something about you, you’re in another country. So how did this all come about?
Star: Well, that’s true. I love to have a party. And I love to travel, but this event is a giant party. So it’s exactly what I love to do. And it’s something that I’m so passionate about. And it’s an event that’s actually pretty easy for me because it is what I like to do. It’s what I do in my, my day to day life is I get women together. We have a good time. And then this just has the twist and the better aspect of we’re doing it for a purpose. We have a cause and you’re getting your like minded women together and it’s just so much [00:02:00] fun.
Dorothy: Oh, well, it’s definitely fun and it’s definitely raised hundreds of thousands of dollars for us And in fact, it is our top third party event and when we say third party event, it means it’s something that we don’t have anything to do with except to go and pick up the check or I mean, that’s that’s a weird way of saying it but someone in the community does all of the work brings all the people together raises the money and then presents it to us and that is one of the Mainstays of our organization is having people in the community that care about The Rose care about their community And are willing to raise money. So how did this event get its name?
Star: Well one I want to go back to what you just said and it’s so fun for us to do our own event Because we can do it exactly the way that we want, which is so different than other events is they already have an outline of more or less what they’re expecting from you and to create your own [00:03:00] event. You have endless possibilities of your vision and to contact the people you like. And so it’s been really good for— for us. I was having dinner at Ouzu Bay with some girlfriends and we were having martinis and talking and it was the very beginning of October, which was going to be breast cancer month. So we were talking about breast cancer, talking about what we could do, maybe organizing a dinner, including some of our friends.
And right then and there, I text my friend, Alex Smith, who is the president of Atlas Restaurant Group and said, “Hey, maybe we’d like to have a dinner here, raise some money for breast cancer.” And without hesitation, he said, “sure.” He had no idea what I had planned, just was willing to give and willing to do it.
So after a few more cocktails, and having talked about boobs and drinking booze, we decided to name it Booze and Boobs. It was Appropriate.
Dorothy: All right now say that name again. [00:04:00]
Star: So it’s Booze and Boobs and then our little Kind of slogan is “big or small. Let’s save them all,” and it was just it was fun!
Dorothy: I hadn’t heard that part of it. Oh my goodness Well, it’s a great event and uh, if i’m remembering right you called me and you had like 10 days to pull it together. I mean you decided we’re gonna have this party on this date and it was an amazing fundraiser that very first one and of course it’s gone on to Just become huge the the uh.
Star: It was exciting to see what we could do I remember once I got the date secured and I was traveling So I had the dinner with my girlfriends and I left town the very next week or the very next day. Pardon me. It was gonna be gone for a week. So I had limited days that I could pick a day and it worked for the restaurant and I called you and I said, “hi, I’m Star. I know you met me one time before, but [00:05:00] this is what we want to do.” And you were on board. You were so easy. You got the website up and going. And I only reached out to girlfriends and we sold out in two days on our, on our first event.
The restaurant offered us, I think we had 46 people and they gave us beautiful, I think it was four or five course dinner and wine and welcome cocktails. It was fantastic. And the second year I reached out to Atlas restaurant and said, we’d like to do it again, but we need to at least double the space.
And they gave us more than double. And we sold out. In a matter of days again, and we haven’t opened it to the public. It’s just been our friends. And that’s part of what makes the event so fun is everybody knows someone or everyone is friends of a friend. And it really just feels like a giant party . It doesn’t have the feel of most events [00:06:00] that feel really formal.
Dorothy: So Star, you have this philosophy about a zero cost event, and that is just unheard of. I mean, we’re, where did that come from?
Star: So I have been supporting cancer, uh, mainly for 20 years. My, Uh, grandmother and grandfather both died of cancer as well as two of my aunts and my husband lost both of his parents and both of his siblings to cancer.
So it’s definitely the thing that I am most passionate about, but what I have, I realized over all my years of raising money, not only for cancer organizations, but for all charities is they would have a big event and raise all this money, but there was so much overhead and they would. Pay for the food and for the alcohol and for the venue and the flowers and the band And just a portion of what was raised actually went to the charity And I thought I can do this without the [00:07:00] overhead.
It’s going to take a lot more time And a lot more energy and a lot more elbow grease, but it’s possible. And one of the things that I’d realized was when I would go to people to support it or to sponsor it or come buy a ticket and I would say every cent of your donation every cent of your ticket price. Everything goes to The Rose.
We have zero overhead and if I can’t get flowers donated We don’t have flowers and if someone doesn’t donate a step and repeat we don’t have it Everyone was okay with that. Everyone actually liked it more and It definitely takes more work because I have to go and really get everything and I can’t just buy it.
But people absolutely were drawn to that concept. And it was amazing how many people would go and support the restaurant after they’d realized the restaurant group [00:08:00] was donating everything. Which is also unheard of.
Dorothy: Totally.
Star: They’re just beyond generous.
Dorothy: Yeah, I, I, I can’t remember an event and 20, 30 years that has had that zero cost.
That is just wonderful. And, and you’re right. To be able to say to someone, your money’s going to go where we’re telling you, makes a big difference.
Star: And it, you know, I had reached out to some people, and this last year we did sponsorships, which we hadn’t done the year before. So I had reached out to a friend of mine, Dr. Kline, and said, I’m doing this event. His wife was at the event. The year before and said, maybe you would like to sponsor it, but to be honest, it’s really more of a donation because I don’t have anything to offer you. There’s, there’s not a sponsor party and there’s, I don’t even know if we’re going to have any signage or what you’re going to have.
It’s really more of a donation. Hopefully you’d give $2,500. And he responded with, no, he’d give 10. And that was the response I was [00:09:00] getting from people is. Their generosity and their excitement of knowing that the money was going to The Rose every cent.
Dorothy: Wow. Well, I don’t think I’d heard that story. That is wonderful.
Star: It was a great one. There were so many people that just did above and beyond.
Dorothy: Has anyone ever turned you down?
Star: Yes.
Dorothy: And how do you handle that?
Star: I get turned down all the time. It’s not personal. You can’t support everything. Every cause is important, but not every cause is important to each person. So I’m passionate about cancer, but there’s other things that people approach us to support, and we just can’t.
So I, figured every two or three no’s you get a yes, and it doesn’t bother me. I just keep asking.
Dorothy: You certainly do, my goodness. to think that this event is really right up there with some of our top [00:10:00] grants. And you know, that’s a whole process to have someone say, okay, we’ve raised your money is that is, that is so wonderful.
Star: I love it. And the first one we pulled together in just a matter of weeks, two weeks, and this second one, we did it in a couple months, but this third one that’s going to be in January, I know it’s going to be even more amazing. I’m so excited and how many people have reached out to us already wanting to get on board and wanting to be a part of it.
Asking if they can donate artwork to be auctioned off or trips or it’s just phenomenal the outreach and the impact how many people didn’t know about The Rose. And then also how many people that I have met that I was already friends with that have told me stories of how The Rose impacted them. I have a great girlfriend who told me when she was in her 20s and she was uninsured and she had a lump and she went to The Rose and they helped [00:11:00] her.
And now she’s in her 40s and, you know, has insurance and doing great. But you just never know. You never know where you’re going to be.
Dorothy: And you never know when you might find yourself without insurance. We see so many, so many women that have found themselves in a place that they never expected to be and then they find the lump.
And so that is why it’s just so important to me that people know about us. And you being one of our advocates is really spreading the word. How did you know about us to begin with, though?
Star: I had met you at a, an event. It was called 100 Women. And you had shared about The Rose. And for me, what really struck a chord and And got me excited about The Rose was the mobile mammography units because you can reach so many people that otherwise wouldn’t go inconvenience or maybe they don’t have a car or there’s not a facility near them.
[00:12:00] And that’s what I was excited about. And then just the whole concept of insured or not. That you’re going to see everybody. No one’s going to get turned away. And no one’s going to feel any different than the insured person. Whether you’re uninsured or insured, you’re all treated the same. And that was important to me.
Dorothy: Thanks for, thanks for mentioning that. You know, so often I forget to, uh, share that, uh, even our doctors don’t know who is insured and, and uninsured. If they feel like that patient needs something, that’s going to be what they get. And many times I feel like our uninsured women, because of patient navigation, because of all the other things that we wrap together to, to serve that population, sometimes I think, you know, they’re the ones getting the best service.
And it’s, it’s a point of Real pride for me, because I, I can’t stand the idea of just being poor means you’re going to be treated less than. That just doesn’t work in [00:13:00] our organization.
Star: And it’s frightening to me to imagine feeling a lump and having that fear and knowing something’s wrong, but you can’t afford to go somewhere.
Or you’re going to call a clinic and they’re going to see you in weeks or months, and it’s going to take six months for a diagnosis. I’ve had girlfriends, even girlfriends that were at our first event. that since then have been diagnosed with cancer. And girlfriend’s one of my best friends, and her mother has been diagnosed with cancer.
But we had numerous girlfriends at both events that have had cancer or currently have cancer. And you realize how many people are impacted. And, and that’s also what gets people excited to go. And they want to support because they have a mother or sister or a brother. There’s so many people that get impacted by breast cancer.
And if you can go and you can have fun at an event, [00:14:00] it doesn’t feel like you’re going to a charity event, which many of them are stuffy and long and I don’t want to sit in my chair and be quiet and so ours is a fun party.
Dorothy: Yours is a fun party.
Star: Yes.
Dorothy: And as yet, not open to the public. I want to stress that.
It may be someday, but only if Star and her group say yes, because you’re very, very particular, you want to have that fun.
Star: Yes, I want it to be fun and lively and everybody has the best time. And people keep asking, when is the event? Because they want to buy their ticket before it sells out.
Dorothy: Hey, we like that.
Star: Yes, it’s great.
Dorothy: And we like that you’re determined to make it bigger and that just means that we can help more, more women. And, and I, that’s the other thing about a third party event. So many times when we have a grant, it is restricted to a certain group, or a certain age, or a certain county. And, [00:15:00] you know, women don’t always fit that little box.
And so when you have a third party event that is unrestricted, just give it, just do it for your women. My gosh, that gives us so much more flexibility, so much more opportunities to reach out to people that we might not be able to. Uh, and that’s the other part of your event is that it is a community taking care of community.
Star: Absolutely, absolutely. I mean, just the local restaurants and, and the sponsors. My girlfriend, Chloe DiLiao, who owns my drink bomb, she has donated the majority of the swag. Just getting so many people on board that are willing to give, and that’s been really heartwarming and made me feel so good and loved because so many people that have asked have been willing to give, and so easily and quickly said yes.
I don’t know. I feel like [00:16:00] it speaks volumes. It makes me feel really proud.
Dorothy: Oh, well you should. You should. 20 years of raising money now. That was the other part I didn’t know about you. You’ve always been involved in fundraisers.
Star: I have.
Dorothy: Of some kind.
Star: I have.
Dorothy: And cancer has been a field that you’re really passionate about.
Star: It is my passion. Uh, we support many different causes. My husband, he’s more, uh, he’s not private. He’s more private. He doesn’t like to be the face of anything. And I usually don’t either. But when it comes to breast cancer, I want everyone to hear about it. I want to raise awareness. It’s the one that I want to put my face on.
I want my friends to say, Oh. What is she doing? I, how can I help? And each person maybe touches someone else and get someone else to go get their mammogram or someone to think about, Oh, I have a lump. And last year at our event, one [00:17:00] of my girlfriends was saying that she had felt some lumps and she was needing to go to the doctor.
And sometimes you just need a little reminder to get you there.
Dorothy: And that it’s not okay, but that. You need to take care of yourself. I mean, that’s, that’s the message I keep hearing whenever I’ve been around you, that women need to take care of themselves and they need to, uh, and it’s not, it’s not a need to, it’s not.
It’s, it’s something that insurers are going to be around. Something that means, gosh, so much. I remember one young lady was telling you that she had used The Rose and you were so surprised. It was someone you didn’t know. And I thought, you know, that is, that is great. That is great that we have, Network, that word of mouth that keeps out there and keeps reaching the people that need us the most.
Star: Because I have insured girlfriends that tell me that they come to The Rose.
Dorothy: Yes.
Star: Because it’s important to them that they’re helping [00:18:00] someone who’s uninsured.
Dorothy: Yeah, and that is so important. We could never do this without our insured patients. It just There’s not enough money in the world you could raise to do as many women as we do.
Star: And that’s definitely something that I need to get out there to more and let people know.
Dorothy: Yes, yes.
Star: That it’s not just for the uninsured, at The Rose.
Dorothy: Maybe one of these days you’ll have a mobile day.
Star: Oh, that would be fun.
Dorothy: Wouldn’t that be fun?
Star: That would be really fun.
Dorothy: I tell you, I don’t know. I don’t own that big old unit, but it would, it would be so great.
Star: We could maybe do it at one of the classic dealerships.
Dorothy: Oh, yeah.
Star: And bring everybody in. That would be fun.
Dorothy: And tell us a little bit about their involvement.
Star: So, Tiffany Sebastian, she’s the owner of Classic Elite Auto. They have a bunch of Chevrolet dealerships. And her girlfriend was diagnosed with cancer, Mellie Cruz.
And she was young. She’s still young. She’s I believe 42 ish now, but Tiffany was with her when she was diagnosed. And it really [00:19:00] hit her heart of how it can happen to anyone. It doesn’t matter your age. It doesn’t matter what you look like. If you’re the vision of health, it, you don’t know what’s going on inside of you.
And Tiffany’s a great girlfriend and she came on board and she hit the ground running. She was so helpful and passionate and she’s a business woman. So she really gets things done because I’m more of the free spirit, the personality. I want to have the party. So definitely need some organized people with me.
And she is, she’d come in with her spreadsheets and her folders and I’d come in with my Starbucks. So she’s great. She’s fantastic.
Dorothy: Yeah. Great partnership and great group of people. Gosh, I was so. fortunate to be able to go out and visit with some of them really, really care about others. It’s just amazing to me.
I think, I think we would be so, um, much better off in our [00:20:00] world if we admitted we cared and then we did the things that show we care because that’s really what it’s all about.
Star: And it’s fun to bring people on board that haven’t done something like this before as well. Cause Chloe DiLiao, she hadn’t done her own event like this and she was so excited and it’s been a learning process and she’s so passionate.
Dorothy: Oh, she is.
Star: And for next year and she’s already getting things donated. And so it lights a fire under women of what can I do? How can I help and each year women that are at the event ask what can I do next year?
Can I be part of it? Can I help with this or that and people they do want to help. They often don’t know how and they don’t know where to start. And I think maybe helping people also get some ideas of starting small. I know I had a Christmas party one time and I told everyone instead of hostess gifts, bring gift cards and we’re going to give them [00:21:00] to the women’s center and everybody did that instead of hostess gifts and a girlfriend and she had everyone Donate to The Rose for her birthday instead of gifts. There’s so many little things that you can do and creative ideas of where you can give back even if you can’t write a big check or you can’t throw a big party. Maybe you can have some of your girlfriends over for dinner and everybody chip in $30-$50 and you cook them dinner and then donate
Dorothy: Great ideas.
Star: Starting small and thinking, how can I make an impact?
Dorothy: Yes. And you know, I had never really thought about that, but you’re, you’re offering an opportunity over here to learn about giving and to give. And then you’re offering the women who don’t have the opportunity to live. It’s, it’s a wonderful, wonderful way of connecting people.
And you know, that’s the thing. So many times our donors will never know who they helped, but it’s, it’s really, uh, important that we have people like you. I mean, you have been such a [00:22:00] godsend and all of your friends. We love all of them.
Star: Well, they all love you. So many people love The Rose. I love hearing the stories.
I had no idea how many people have been impacted. And like I said, I just didn’t know. I originally thought it was just people that were uninsured and I didn’t put my necessarily friend group in the uninsured.
Dorothy: Right.
Star: So many people you said they end up there. I was uninsured when I was in my 20s and I had pre existing conditions and I couldn’t get medical insurance and it was horrible.
Dorothy: Oh yeah.
Star: I remember trying to wait for a referral from one doctor to another and you, you wait three weeks to get in, you have a cold and I thought, well, by the time I get in, I won’t have a cold anymore. You know, it’s, it’s, you just don’t know, you don’t know where you’re going to be, but it’s so important to be able to get seen.
Especially when it comes to cancer, because [00:23:00] time is of the essence.
Dorothy: That early prevention is all, what it’s all about. That’s going to give us, that’s going to be the thing that helps women to survive. So Star, as we close up this episode, thank you again so much for being with us today. But do you have some parting words for our listeners. And I, I think, I think everything you’ve told us has been great, but give us one more reason why we would be involved in something like this.
Star: Well, I would close by saying that everyone can make a difference and everyone can make an impact no matter how big or how small, it doesn’t matter. Just get out there and do something. Gather your book club or your Bible study and See how you can help and and raise money and you can’t just sit by and watch you have to get up off your butt and you got to get out there.
Dorothy: Anyone can do this is what you’re saying.
Star: Yes, anyone can do it.
Dorothy: And not anyone is a Star Hand. And so we, we are just so [00:24:00] happy, pleased that you’ve joined us today and cannot tell you thank you enough. There have been so many great things that have come out of this event, and we just appreciate your big heart.
Star: I’m honored, and I’m thankful to have the chance to support The Rose. It means a lot to me.
Dorothy: Oh, Star, you’re so special. All right.
Star: You’re making me blush.
Dorothy: Until our next episode. We’re gonna say goodbye to Star and can’t wait for her next event.
Star: I can’t wait. Booze and Boobs.
Post-Credits: Thank you for joining us today on Let’s Talk About Your Breasts. This podcast is brought to you by The Rose. Visit therose.org to learn more about our organization. Subscribe to our podcast, share episodes with friends, and join the conversation on social media using #Let’sTalkAboutYourBreasts. We welcome your feedback and suggestions. Consider supporting The Rose. Your gift can make the difference to a person in need. And remember, self care [00:25:00] is not selfish. It’s essential.
