Episode 174

A Family’s Experience with Breast Cancer

Date
December 19, 2023
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Moosa Family - Isa, Abdul, Fatima, Ashma

Summary

In this three-in-one episode, listeners will hear about Ashma Khanani-Moosa’s battle and victory against breast cancer and how her resilience is mirrored by her husband, Dr. Abdul Moosa, and their children, Fatima and Isa.

Dr. Moosa and their children articulate the emotional challenges and strength they discovered alongside Ashma during her fight.

This powerful episode serves as a testament to the far-reaching effects of breast cancer on families facing this challenge together.

Transcript

Dorothy: [00:00:00] All throughout the month of December, we are spotlighting the women who are the epitome of the Mission of the Rose. In this episode, you’re going to hear from Ashma Moosa and you’re going to hear her children and her husband talk about what it takes to get a family through breast cancer. Your contribution could help us help another family.

Just like the Moosa’s and make their holiday season so much brighter

Let’s talk about your breast a different kind of podcast Presented to you by the Rose Breast Center of Excellence and a Texas treasure You’re going to hear frank discussions about tough topics and you’re going to learn why knowing about your breast could save your life. Join us as we hear another story and we answer those tough questions that you may have.

Hi, it’s a brand new day and this is Dorothy [00:01:00] Gibbons, CEO and co founder of The Rose and we’re here to talk about your breast. Today we have with us Ashma Moosa, who is one of those extraordinary women who is always busy, never says no, and she’s also a two time cancer survivor. She’s, uh, very active in her community.

She’s a, a coach, a health coach, and she’s run the Laporte Clinic for 35 years. And She’s an RN, so Ashma, tell us a little bit about your story, and you started with us as a patient, is that right?

Ashma: Correct, yes, I was actually, my second cancer was breast cancer, and um, usually we send our patients over here from the clinic, but the tables were turned this time, and I got a call from the Rose.

Uh, saying that there’s something suspicious in the ro—, uh, in the [00:02:00] mammogram. And so that’s where my journey began, is at the Rose. Um, I was, you know, when I got my mammogram done, whenever I come here, It’s so comfortable to be in this environment because of the way it’s set up and how the technicians, you know, treat you.

So I always felt very comfortable coming here. But coming in to get a biopsy done, I was a little nervous that day, but Dr. Melillo, as wonderful as she is, she made me feel very comfortable. We got the biopsy done, and then we had to wait, um, for about a week to get the results back. Um, so that’s where it all began, is at the Rose.

Dorothy: And this was not the easiest journey for you.

Ashma: No.

Dorothy: You, you certainly had, um, came at an awful time within your life and young children. And, uh, tell us a little bit about what [00:03:00] was some of the most difficult times that you went through there.

Ashma: So with, compared to my first cancer, that which was thyroid, and usually in the medical arena, if you have a diagnosis of a thyroid cancer, That’s the one you want because it’s very easily treated, but now this was my secondary, primary, uh, and that’s when I kind of was a little bit more concerned and sometimes knowing too much, uh, being that my husband’s a physician and I’m a nurse and, you know, we know a lot more and we see a lot more in the clinics and that’s what kind of, I had a lot of questions and a lot of unknowns that were going through my head, but my main thing was that I, I was very concerned about my children.

Now they were old enough to understand the word cancer. So, me and my husband decided we were going to sit them down and tell them just enough what they need to know. And if they had any other questions we would, you know, but we made [00:04:00] it sound like, you know, we were going to get through this together as a family and we were going to use this opportunity to strengthen our bonds.

And get through this together and mommy will be tired and so she will need your help. But the schedules are going to remain pretty much the same because I didn’t want them to be scarred. When you have a change in their schedules, children become a little bit more displaced. And so I tried my very best to create an environment for my children at home.

That was normal, but yet I got some help and that way I was able to not take on too much. And when it was 2 o’clock after my chemo, I would get up and take a shower so they could see a normal mom at the door. And I would, you know, greet them at the door when they got off the bus.

Dorothy: So your treatment included [00:05:00] chemotherapy and surgery.

And this was a pretty extensive surgery.

Ashma: Yes, it was. Um, you know, one of the choices as a woman going through breast cancer. There’s so many choices for you now, depending on what kind of cancer you had. Mine was a little bit more of an aggressive type cancer, which they didn’t know until they got the surgical biopsy.

Initially, um, they recommended a lumpectomy. And I don’t know, for some reason, the lumpectomy didn’t sound like, it just felt like there was going to be more later on. Being, again, thinking about being a second primary. And I thought, what if the, uh, cancer goes from one side to the other, then I’ll have to end up going and getting another lumpectomy.

And so I, I did pray about it. I’m a woman of faith. Um, and I made the choice of doing a bilateral mastectomy. Even though [00:06:00] my physician was not happy because the outcomes are usually the same, she said. So I went under, uh, decided to get a transplant, actually, because I didn’t want anything foreign in my body.

So I told them, is there any way, the most natural way you can rebuild me after the mastectomy? So I, I chose to do that. I did go and speak to several, uh, plastic surgeons. Anybody can remove the tissue, but how are you going to be put back together as a, um, As a woman feeling comfortable with her body. So I did my research and went ahead and went under this surgery, which was about 16 hours.

So had, um, the breasts removed and then the plastic surgeon came in and did his part, you know, and it’s amazing how sometimes your gut feeling tells you the right thing. And after I went in for my first checkup, after my surgery, the surgeon [00:07:00] sat down with me and she said, you know, you made the right choice because Your cancer was actually outside the margins.

So we would have removed your right breast, not just done a lumpectomy. So what you chose was perfect because we were able to remove that breast and the other one and rebuild you, you know, more of a symmetrical way. Um, so in a way I, I felt like something was guiding me. The inner light was there. But then as they went in deeper, uh, into the biopsies and the biopsies are incredible these days, you know, what they can tell you and they said that, you know, I had a HER2 positive cancer, which can come back, uh, because of, uh, the surgery I had, um, maybe, uh, cancer cell can float away somewhere and it can come back very aggressive.

So I was recommended to do prophylactically chemotherapy. [00:08:00] And I think that’s when I really lost my strength and I got shattered. And I thought, still I’m being tested? So my husband told me, he said, you know, I think we should just go ahead and get it done. So that way you bring your odds down. And I did it because I needed to bring all my odds down because I wanted to be here for my kids.

Dorothy: Right. And, and Fatima tells a story about coming home one day and finding you in that dark, low place.

Ashma: Yes.

Dorothy: And describe that for us and tell us what she did to move her mother out of there.

Ashma: So, um, initially Fatima was, she’s always been very, very sensitive person. My Isa, my younger one is more bubbly and kind of goes along with things.

So even when I was lost my hair, she had a very hard time. I mean, she just got completely shattered. And then one day she came home. This was [00:09:00] like maybe a year after. my chemo and I’ve had my surgery. I never really went back to get, um, what they call, uh, tattooing for your nipples because actually I, they gave me a choice whether you wanted to leave your nipples or not.

And I chose not to because that’s where the cancer can reside and come back. So basically I had nothing there and I guess she saw that I was very upset that day and she was actually shadowing my plastic surgeon. Because she wanted to venture into this, um, you know, this field one day. So she said to me, Mom, I have seen those surgeries, how they re, you know, rebuild women.

It’s amazing what they do. It’s like a tailor tailoring out their whole body and redoing it. And she told me, she said, mom, let me do some Henna [00:10:00] art on you because she’s a Henna artist. She’s a self taught Henna artist. So she kind of laid me down and she’s mom. I want you to just be still because I’m a, I’m one of those people that can’t stay still.

I have to keep moving around. And I actually fell asleep and she was at, you know, my chest working at it and making these designs. And I, I, you know, I was just sleeping there on the lounger while she was doing this. And when I woke up, I looked at myself and I thought, wow, I can’t see the scars. They’re gone.

And then she made an appointment with my plastic surgeon and told me, she said, Oh, they wanted to see you today. And she actually talked to the tattoo artist there at the plastic surgeon’s office, that my mom is going to be here and we’re going to do those 3D tattoos on her. So, again, I wanted to make my daughter feel completely comfortable talking about breasts [00:11:00] and breast cancer.

Because if I would have hidden that, I don’t think she would have felt comfortable even taking me that day.

Dorothy: So Ashma, talk to us a little bit about the Indian, South Asian culture that could really get in the way of women having screening or any of that. And by the way, you’re out in that community all the time talking to your sisters and, and trying to share what you know about it.

So tell us, what is it that holds them back or…?

Ashma: So initially, you know, I, when I finished my chemo and I decided that now it was my, my duty to turn around and help other women and empower them. So I decided to start my, uh, outreach at my place of faith. And when I started talking about breast cancer, there was a lot of resistance.

And especially from the, the [00:12:00] male part of the, uh, congregation. And so I didn’t hold back. I thought, you know what, what I’ve been through, I want them to feel comfortable and go and get these tests done ahead of time. So there’s, and then, you know, we can prevent this. So I actually reached out to the Rose and said, I want to bring the mobile mammogram at the mosque.

I think I’m the first Muslim woman. Anywhere that has brought a mammogram machine at the mosque and I signed up maybe 20 women. They had never had their mammograms done. They were over 40. Some of them are very scared, but knowing that they were going to come to the mosque and we were going to give them the privacy to do this screening mammogram, they felt a lot more comfortable.

Again, I got a lot of resistance and I had to really fight through that. Because I knew this is a mission that needs to be fought for [00:13:00] women, to empower them to feel comfortable talking about this very sensitive subject. And so many women came out of the woodworks, wanted to talk to me, felt more comfortable with me because I gave them that safe space to speak about this.

They don’t want to talk about breasts. They don’t want to talk about their private, you know, private parts. So having a pap smear, they don’t want to talk about all that. But now I’m seeing the light. I’ve started a support group, so that gives them another space to sort of, um, talk and share and empower the women.

And that’s what we need to do is, we, as women, when we go through something, we’re like, okay, we got through this, fine. But you need to share that. How did you get through? Maybe you might make a change for somebody else.

Dorothy: So true. So true. Now you serve on The Rose board you have for many years now, and you also are on the board at the, at the mosque.

[00:14:00] And that’s pretty rare for a woman.

Ashma: Yes, it is. I want to mention one particular person that has made huge impact in our community. And that’s our leader, Dr. Basuni, who is our Imam, who is our leader. And he Is the one that gave me the voice in that community. And he asked me, he said, sister, I want you to be on my board and I want you to continue what you’re doing to bring these subjects out and making women talk about it.

And, and so we started doing a lot of programs, health and wellness and things like that. During Ramadan, we do a biggest loser, um, competition. So I thank my community leader because usually in a Muslim community, it’s. It’s not very common for women to have that leadership, but I feel very, very, very encouraged and [00:15:00] very proud of my community and my leader.

Dorothy: Well, and certainly you carry that role very well as a leader yourself. And I look at your history and I think you’ve been volunteer extraordinary. You’ve, you’ve done so many special events just for your community. I think you were out doing presentations this last week and like three times. I mean, it’s just amazing the commitment you have to that.

And we all know that this is a very private subject and for you to be so open about it really, really makes a difference. So why is that support, you know, you talk, you mentioned your support group. And why is that support so important?

Ashma: So, you know, when I was going through, again, I’m talking with my own experience, why, why I do things.

And the way I do them because I try to look back and see what was lacking [00:16:00] when I was going through this journey. And I didn’t have a really safe space support group that I joined because again, with my culture, nobody really goes to those things. But as I was volunteering and I was, you know, going more into the breast cancer arena, as you would call it, maybe, you know, like support groups are out there for women.

Um, there’s a lot of, um, times when you feel uncomfortable going to a support group, you know, and that’s from my own experience. I’m like, I don’t know if I really want to go to a support group. What am I going to do? Well, how are they going to help me? But as I understood more and more about what support groups can do, I did, uh, further my certification and coaching.

So my coaching actually is more geared to cancer women. Women is my soft spot. And [00:17:00] women that are depressed going through, um, you know, there’s a lot of abuse and these women have no way, no place to go to talk about it. And I think that’s what encouraged me, like, you know, I am blessed to have a support person, a spouse, a family.

These women sometimes don’t have anything when they’re going through this cancer journey. So this gave me such a, um, I guess a, A way of comforting them and to let them know you can come here. You can, it’s okay to talk about, you know, how you’re feeling and it has really taken off really well.

Dorothy: Yes, it has.

It’s, it’s really extraordinary. So you’ve been tireless in your fundraising and in your awareness and tell us how your event came about.

Ashma: So I remember [00:18:00] you recruiting me for the Rose and I was, I was volunteering at MD Anderson at that time, and I was very involved there, and then, um, so what I did was, the first year of my, uh, survivorship, I wanted to celebrate, and I thought, I’m a really deep thinker, so I thought, what can I do, I mean you can buy things for people, but what can I really do that they’ll remember, so, I have a passion for tea parties.

Cause I used to have a tea room and I have a lot of teapots and tea sets. So I thought, you know what, let me make a really nice tea party and to thank my, my girlfriends, my community that helped me through whenever I’ve needed them. So I had that at my house initially and every year, you know, I would have, and every year my, I guess my tea party group grew, grew because I was getting to know more survivors and then we would celebrate them, [00:19:00] uh, during these tea parties.

And it usually be in October, of course. And then here I am now I’m joining the Rose and my tea party is coming up. So that’s when I approached you and I said, you know, why don’t we make this a benefit? And you and I both know that initially I was very hesitant to have it at a tea room and I didn’t know how this was going to go.

But we were sold out. And I think we had to move Uh immediately the following year to a bigger space. So Here we are. Um, I think this would be our seventh one maybe So I feel so Grateful that a small event like that can grow with love and it takes time and that, that event actually shows me that you should never give up.

Dorothy: You took this tea party and you had for your [00:20:00] friends and then you started charging them to come to it.

Ashma: Yes. And it felt a little, I don’t know how to charge it. I don’t know how to ask for. Like pay me for this. I just don’t know how to do that. So what I had to ask them for, you know, the For I felt a little uncomfortable.

I thought, you know, are they really going to pay for this? You know, and like I said, you know, they don’t mind because the mission behind The Rose and the the way I present it to them. And again, the mission, the, uh, the, the way the rose functions is the most important, I guess I want to say a ministry.

Because when you, when three women with insurance come here that pays for one woman, how much better can you, can you give back to your own community? So that is one thing, but say if a woman does not have anything, she can still come to the Rose and she’ll be taken care of. And I love that mission. And I think it’s because of [00:21:00] my My strong faith that whenever you work with somebody, you should really look back and see, yes, you’re going to get back something from this, but what are you going to give back to it?

And so that has been my mission with the Rose, and it just excites me to keep going. And actually, that gives me hope.

Dorothy: Yes. Now you call your event Hats and Henna High Tea, and everyone comes in hats. And I mean, it’s just a, a beautiful event. The women all just look so gorgeous and you’re right. We had to move three times to, to accommodate the group.

And I think your last event was probably the most profound in that you had that play live play very short. But it certainly showed what can happen in a Muslim woman’s life when she has breast cancer. Really, really moving. And I was watching the people in the room and the women. You [00:22:00] can see they, they just related immediately.

They knew that this is a hard thing, sometimes very hard for the men to accept. And, and it ended beautifully. It was perfect. So thank you for doing this. That, that, uh, Tea has raised. Over $100,000.

Ashma: Yeah, I think so. I’ve lost count. You should know that.

Dorothy: I know that. I know. I was looking and so it’s a bit over $100,000.

That’s really incredible because this isn’t a high dollar event and yet to have raised that much. And you’ve certainly sent a lot of women to the Rose who needed our help as well as those who have the insurance.

Ashma: You know, I think my cancer journey is so meaningful. A lot of things, and isn’t that what we’re supposed to do in our life?

Is to find what are you supposed to do? Why are you here? And I think this is what gives me a great purpose of my life. To be able to [00:23:00] do that. Yes, the event is wonderful, it’s, you know, People, women get out, meet other women. And I try to, try to aim for, uh, you know, making it more cultural. So we have that, the henna, the hats, the ethnic clothing, we’ve had fashion shows and each event that I’ve done, I have to think very carefully.

It’s not about the showing, you know, or, you know, making people feel like, oh, they have to come here and show off or, you know, there’s a lot of events out there that are more bougie, as you call it, but this is from beginning to end, very meaningful. And I have been told several times. Why don’t you change your event to serving wine or, you know, no, this event is not about pleasure in that sense.

Yes, it’s fun. I want them to walk away from their feeling like they learned something. They’re [00:24:00] going to make a change in their life and they are going to give back to this horrible. horrific disease that women go through.

Dorothy: So I read something the other day about once you found your purpose in life, then it’s your responsibility to give it away.

And you have certainly, certainly done that. So Ashma, you had a very difficult time having children. You had several miscarriages. It was, uh, the dream of you and Dr. Moosa to have a family. So now that, that you have two, what do you hope for your daughter and your son as we move forward in life?

Ashma: So one of the things that, you know, my husband and I have always said, because these two children were truly a gift, I was told that I was not going to be a mother.

But Again, I put my faith in God and I did extreme treatments that probably no woman would probably go [00:25:00] through. And I did this, I had seven pregnancies basically and I got two out of them. And I was told I could only have one and that’s it. But then five years later when I saw Fatima all, you know, alone and not a sibling, I thought, I need to try for another one.

When I went back to see my doctor, she was not happy at all. You know, and I can be very persistent. So she says, okay, okay, you know, we’ll go ahead and get the fertility, you know, medication started and all that. So we did all that. And again, it was the most impossible, um, I mean, we can do a whole show on this because it was the most impossible thing that became possible.

And I don’t know, that was a blessing that came into our lives. And, you know, when we had our children, we love our children, we spend a lot of time with them. We, we actually prefer to spend time with them and show them the world. Let them see other cultures, other religions, to make them a better person. [00:26:00] I wasn’t worried about, you know, which college they were going to go or which career they were going to pick.

Our main goal is to make them good human beings. And whatever will come out of it will come out. And I’m seeing that in both my children. So that has never been a concern. Like what go after your passion. That’s so important.

Dorothy: That’s so true. So true. And certainly your children have, they’ve really have followed.

All of your advice, and you can tell they are glowing with love .

Ashma: I hope so.

Dorothy: Yeah, they do, they do. So you mentioned it before, but I’d like to end on this one last question about who was your best support during this time?

Ashma: My husband. He’s a very rare human being. He’s just so always in a meditative state. He doesn’t even have to work hard at it.

He loves what he does. [00:27:00] And he loves me, truly loves me. And I think when we, two people, when they love each other and they’re engaged, I was actually recently told that, you know, we, we are so much disgustingly in love with each other that you can’t stand it. But it’s like a pea in a pod. And when you have that kind of relationship with your, your spouse, so it could be, it’s a relationship with your sister that could be your supporter.

But that relationship is so beautiful. And I think, I don’t think I would have been able to do all this without, and he, he’s my cheerleader. He never discourages me. He has never tried to change me since the day I got married. He lets me be who I am and I have supported him 100 percent in his career and in his endeavors to start a practice.

So I think I made a good decision saying yes to him.

Dorothy: Oh yes, oh yes, of course. He’s your escort, he’s your friend, he’s, he’s [00:28:00] always there with you, for you.

Ashma: Yes.

Dorothy: And we are very, very grateful to have you on our board, to have you as a fundraiser for us. And You’re helping us to reach a community we’d never ever be able to reach, you know, you’re opening those doors and Introducing yourself and the Rose has meant so much to how many women we’ve seen I wouldn’t even start to guess how many you’ve sent to us

Ashma: Yeah, I mean, you know, um, when they see me, they’re like, here, here she comes, she’s gonna need a, need a donation for The Rose or something.

But, you know, I hold myself with great respect, and whenever I voice my concern or my love for something, they know that, uh, you know, I am a woman that really means, and where, where I put my, I put my talk where it’s supposed to be, and so they listen, they really listen. And [00:29:00] again, you know, that takes time, it takes effort.

It takes an organization like The Rose to also back, back you up. And Dorothy, you are, you’re my mentor in so many ways.

Dorothy: Oh my goodness, thank you for that, but I think it goes both ways. So, again, we’re so fortunate to have you and to have you on this program. Thank you for everything you’re doing in the community.

Any final words for our audience?

Ashma: You know, I always end by saying that no matter what challenge you go through in life, that’s, that’s life. You are going to have small challenges and big challenges. Never lose hope. And even if you do lose hope, it’s okay sometimes to break down. But remember, when you’re standing up straight and everything went well, look around and see who else needs a lift.

Dorothy: Excellent. Excellent. [00:30:00] Well, thank you so much. And we will have another session very soon. I’m sure to hear more about what you’re doing in the community and thank our listeners for joining us on let’s talk about your breast.

Ashma: Thank you, Dorothy.

Dr. Abdul: Hi, I’m Dr. Abdul Moosa. I’m a family physician in La Porte.

Dorothy: So Dr. Moosa, what does The Rose mean to you?

Dr. Abdul: So about 15 years ago, The Rose is where my wife went to get a routine mammogram. And next thing I know she’s diagnosed with cancer and she went through the treatment. The Rose walked her through all the journey.

And the most fantastic person I met was Dixie Melillo over there. And she held her hand, held my hand. Even though I’m a physician, it’s, being on the other end, it was heartbreaking for me and I was sort of lost. And so she guided me to make sure I understood what’s going to happen next. So for their, forever I’m grateful for them.[00:31:00]

for doing what they do to the community and helping more people out.

Dorothy: What surprised you most about the rose from a physician’s perspective?

Dr. Abdul: One of the aspects is the gentleness. They are geared towards women. And my patients who have gone other places for mammogram, and when they’ve gone to The Rose, it’s like a day and night difference.

They tell me they’re so good, so efficient. And so gentle compared to other places and that’s one of the joys I have that this organization really caters to women and make sure that the experience is, um, most pleasant as possible so then they don’t next time they’re like, Oh my God, it hurt me so bad. I never want to go back and do that again.

Now they’re like, Oh, The Rose. Oh yeah, I’ll go there. Don’t worry. There was a great time. Last time I had, let me go again now. So that’s one of the things I really love. And every three patients of mine who have insurance, That said, you know, they tell me that they’ll pay for at least one who does not have [00:32:00] insurance.

So I try to encourage women who have insurance to go there. And once they hear the story of the rose and how it will impact other women who don’t have insurance and in a way they are helping facilitate that, they really want to go for it. They’re like, oh, I’m going to help somebody else.

Dorothy: And Dr. Moosa, being a spouse who has Watched his wife go through breast cancer.

What advice do you have for spouses?

Dr. Abdul: One of the things you have to take is take a deep breath. When I found out that she had cancer, it seemed like the world crumbled around me. She was the, the one who ran the house. She took care of the kids, she took care of the bills. All I had to do was go to work and see my patients come home and everything’s done.

I did not have to do anything and now suddenly that was not there. So that’s what affected me. So to me My best advice, you as a partner, make sure you understand what she’s doing, what responsibilities, and try to get involved in those responsibilities, so when [00:33:00] anything like that happens, you’re not sort of lost in the water, in the ocean, at least you can handle the load.

And the other thing is to be supportive. When women are going through this journey, there’s lots of ups and downs, and you are the ones who have to hold strong itself. I remember I’d come there and she’d be broken down and I’d just lift her up and make sure that she’s taken care of at the same time. I wanted to cry so bad, but I did not.

I held it in. The only time I really broke down is when I went back to the office and she was not there in that chair and I sat in her chair and I just literally cried. I did call her and said, I don’t know if I can handle this because you’re not here. I’m the only one in the office. with the, you know, the rest of the staff, but you’re the main person I wanted to see here.

And she told me, she goes, you know what? You can come home if you want to right now. It’s okay. You know, but if this is where your heart is, you have to help other people. Do [00:34:00] so. I’m fine. You know, you have helped me out through this journey. Those encouraging words made me want to stay in the office and finish the day.

First day was very tough, so whenever you’re a spouse and you have to go back to work or whatever the duties are, Those first few days are going to be extremely hard for you. Your mind is not going to be there. But you know, life goes on. You have to persevere. You have to support her. So that’s what I’d advise.

Just take a deep breath in, learn the duties and support them. Just go forward, one day at a time, one baby step at a time.

Fatima: My name is Fatima Khanani-Moosa. I am Ashma’s daughter.

Isa: My name is Isa Khanani-Moosa. I am the son of Ashma Khanani-Moosa.

Fatima: Obviously cancer has a very soft spot in my heart, and I wanted to do anything I could to reach cancer patients, and so I had this opportunity. A long time family friend actually owns a clinical research center and since it’s a phase one [00:35:00] clinical research, they do a lot of cancer research for people who are at their end stages of life.

And so a lot of that is very rewarding and very giving. I do see a lot of cancer patients that come in and they’re receiving this new course of treatment that could potentially help future people who are going through the same cancer as them. And when they have no other option, this is the perfect option for them so that they have a little bit of hope.

Dorothy: What have you learned from your mother’s cancer journey?

Fatima: I think it has really tested my empathy now more than ever. I’m a very emotional person, but being strong for someone is actually To me, more important in those situations. Yes, it’s good to cry and empathize with somebody, but being someone’s strong person who can be there to joke with them during these hard times and just lighten up the moment is really what I’ve learned actually.

It’s like not everything is so serious, not everything is so sad, but um, looking at the lighter things in life and like what, what stories we have already experienced and um, [00:36:00] the positives when it comes to that.

Isa: Never carry the sadness that they have. Try to always be uplifting, um, try to always lighten the mood, um, even if you crack a joke there and there, um, during serious times, it always will be remembered and thought of as you getting through those hard times.

Dorothy: Why is it so important to have light hearted moments or times that are Full of laughter when fighting cancer.

Fatima: You can really take these, um, hardships in your life as something that you’re gonna remember forever and kind of like have a pity me moment for the rest of your life, or you can take it. and grow from it and implement it into your life and help future people.

And I feel that is like one of the biggest learning curves for me. Um, it’s really easy to sit there and wallow and think about what you have been through and how hard it’s been and how hard it may be or it’s gonna be in the future. But ultimately, how I’m able to [00:37:00] manipulate that and implementing it in everyday life and just like dealing with hardships but in a more, um, intricate way of like the way that you use.

Those other healing powers, but using that in your real life and, um, just being able to convey that. And the two is kind of crazy because I feel like a lot of people don’t have that experience of having that hardship. And so sometimes you need those hardships to be more wise and make those decisions.

The hardships do have a little bit of positivity in it as well.

Post-Credits: Thank you for joining us today on Let’s Talk About Your Breasts. This podcast is produced by Speke Podcasting, and brought to you by the Rose. Visit therose.org to learn more about our organization. Subscribe to our podcast, share episodes with friends, and join the conversation on social media using hashtag #Let’sTalkAboutYourBreasts. We welcome your feedback and suggestions. Consider supporting the Rose. Your gift can make the difference to a person in need. Remember, self care is not selfish. It’s essential.[00:38:00]

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